Co-op Brought This Couple Together and Then Kept Them Apart

If it hadn’t been for the University of Cincinnati’s

cooperative education program

, one-time industrial design student John Koenig and one-time graphic design student Pam Lee might never have met.

But, thanks to

co-op

, Memorial Day weekend in 1986 found them both in New York City and in a group of UC co-op students at Coney Island in Brooklyn for the holiday.

And the close of that day found the group at Junior’s in Brooklyn, a restaurant famous for its cheesecake. Recalls Pam, “Actually, we weren’t even sitting together except then a friend of mine switched places because of who liked what kind of cheesecake, since we were splitting the pieces. Because of that, John sat next to me, and we began to talk.”

But the road from that first conversation to their eventual marriage almost a decade later wasn’t precisely smooth.

John recollects the first time he greeted Pam once they were both back at UC’s College of Design, Architecture, Art, and Planning (DAAP) for summer quarter: “I was walking with a friend between Braunstein Hall and Wilson Auditorium. We passed Pam, and I said hello and greeted her by name. Then, I became a little afraid that I had misremembered her name and called her by the wrong name.”

As it was, he did correctly recall her name; however, it did seem that their timing and signals were off, even as John began to visit Pam in studio at the end of each day. He states, “That was a hot summer, and where I was working in the upper floors of DAAP didn’t have any air conditioning. Pam was working in the lower floors of Wolfson where there was air conditioning. It was a chance to get a break from the heat and humidity.”

However, when he finally asked Pam to a party, he added that she could bring a friend. John laughs, “I’m not sure which of us was playing harder to get. She was not giving me signs she was interested and vice versa.”

Not to mention that Tony Kawanari, associate professor of design, routinely told his students they didn’t have the time for romance, that dating equaled distraction.

Still, John says he knew he wanted to date someone “smarter than I was. I was smart enough to know that I needed to be taken down a few notches. I knew I’d found that in Pam. She had more natural design ability that I did. She worked smarter vs. my method of working harder. And she was brutally honest but also genuinely kind all in one.”

Pam and John did eventually go on their first real date that July, out to dinner, a walk in Burnet Woods and then back to studio to work some more. Pam attests, “That’s how dating works in a program as intense as DAAP. You visit each other in studio every day.”

And then it was time for fall co-ops. Pam headed for Minneapolis, and John for San Diego. Later co-ops also kept them in separate cities, staying in touch via letters and phone calls.

And come graduation in 1988, it was a real question whether they would continue as a couple.

Pam recollects that she had liked that John was from Cincinnati because she eventually wanted to raise a family here. He, however, wanted to focus on design and live in California. John states, “I was going to be the greatest designer but not, however, in Cincinnati.”

But when they graduated, it was Pam who moved to New York City, while John found work in nearby Dayton, Ohio. He says, “I then spent the next year asking her when she was going to move back – and flying to New York every third weekend. I’d come to realize it didn’t matter where I lived, in a certain city or not, as long as I had the chance to do good work.”

With that realization, they eventually found themselves in the same city – Columbus, Ohio – in the early 1990s, got married in 1994 before later returning to live in Cincinnati where John is currently associate design director for Procter & Gamble’s home care division, and Pam has pursued consulting and contract work for more than two decades as well as a healthcare career.

They currently live in Colerain Township, and both lay claim to creative design choices involving the house.

Pam laughs, “It took us three years to decide on what color to paint the house because we both had such strong opinions, and we each argue with authority. That’s also been the case with projects from decks to porches.” She adds that their current project – a fire pit – will likely take two years as they design and create individually distinct stepping stones for the project.

So, their DAAP roots continue to influence their daily lives as a couple and family with three children. And, according to Pam, “We still get together with our original friends from DAAP, who were part of our relationship all along thanks to the close-knit bonds formed in studio. And that continues to renew and rejuvenate our relationship.”